It occurred to me recently that perhaps the loss of compassion in America is due to many of us taking ourselves too seriously. My community, and I am sure yours is very similar, is made up of such a diverse spread of socio-economic groups. It is most easily recognized in community events such as a 4th of July firework celebration or ... church. I was sitting in my Sunday school class recently and listened to my different friends lift up praises or prayer requests. A man who had just started attending with his fiance raised his hand and shared a concern that was disturbing and yet very predictable to me. This couple is obviously very different than the average member at my church in the way that they dress, speaking in a very factual sense. He shared that while our class had given a very warm welcome to them, he felt isolated and rejected as he walked through the church corridors. Isn't it supposed to be the opposite of this in church? It is stories like this that hit me in the chest and make me realize how very real the divisions in our society can be.
As I find myself out networking in the professional world, I run across all types of people. Because of my line of work, I hit the full spectrum of these types. This exposure has really challenged me lately and I find myself questioning what it really takes to be an effective leader in my community. I see people running in their little circles and like all circles, they point inward at themselves. This is not true of all people because I know some very generous and caring people. But these are certainly the exception rather than the norm.
Why talk about this you may ask. This is by no means a new reality. It's just that I look around at all of the potential that my community holds for making a difference in people's lives, and it is often soured by inward focus and snobbery. I think we sometimes take ourselves too seriously. My problems are just as real as yours. My challenges are no more difficult than yours. They are just different. We all put our pants on one leg at a time and we all cry when we are hurt.
Humility is something we could all use more of. Whether you are a CEO, a director, a project manager, an assembly line worker, or a fry cook...are you taking yourself too seriously? Do you stop to hold the door for the person behind you, or are you above that? Do you look up to smile at the person riding the elevator with you? Do you ring the Salvation Army bell at Christmas, or would Roger from the club laugh if he saw you? I could do better at reaching out to people and letting compassion influence more of my actions. How about you?
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Don Miller in his exquisitely post-modern collection of thoughts on spiritual Christianity, Blue Like Jazz, notes that "what I believe is not what I say I believe; what I believe is what I do."
A similarly stirring quote from one of my favorite remakes of all time is found in the new Batman (beginnings) when Christian Bale as Batman says "It's not who I am, but what I do that defines me."
Both quotes get to the heart of the matter: while most Christians will SAY that they are accepting of others or care about the poor or are self-less; their actions prove otherwise. This is especially true of American Christians.
Before we get to pointing fingers here, I will stand up and say that I am usually included in this category - actually most of the time would be more accurate.
How can we seriously care about others when all around us there are less fortunate people but are main priority is "me" or "mine" or even "my family?"
Well I would say #1 - humility is a good start.
#2 - as old fashioned as it may seem, I think Tithing plays a key component here. If we are able to freely give at least 10% of our income away - it loosens the chains of greed. John Wesley was known for giving away 10% of his first salary as a pastor back to the church. Then each time he got a raise, he added it to the 10%. He lived his whole life on the same starting salary and gave away the rest - at the end, he was giving away something like 80% of his salary.
#3 - Make an effort to put others first - it can start to become a habit.
#4 - Find a way to directly help others regularly - volunteer, sponsor a child, something.
#5 - If you feel called or are able, go into full time ministry or non-profit work.
I'll end with another quote from Blue Like Jazz:
In discussing the issue of dying for one's beliefs he says, "dying for something is easy because it is associated with glory. Living for something... is the hard thing."
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